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I promise I will go back to drawing soon.
Truth is, sketching has always been a coping mechanism for the longest time, and it feels like in the past few years it just hasn't been the same.
Perhaps, I just don't have the time anymore or am too easily bummed out by other's immense progress.
Of course, everyone works at their own pace, but after a few years in the "department" a certain level of progress is to be expected, and I just haven't indulged enough to reach it.
Currently concentrating on portraits and still life recreation.
Been a few health issues, college, etc getting in the way.
But I hope it'll all clear itself up soon, along with all other distractions which may or may not get in my way.
I have faith in myself. Sort of.
Oh yeah, I'm also in love. H a h.
Truth is, sketching has always been a coping mechanism for the longest time, and it feels like in the past few years it just hasn't been the same.
Perhaps, I just don't have the time anymore or am too easily bummed out by other's immense progress.
Of course, everyone works at their own pace, but after a few years in the "department" a certain level of progress is to be expected, and I just haven't indulged enough to reach it.
Currently concentrating on portraits and still life recreation.
Been a few health issues, college, etc getting in the way.
But I hope it'll all clear itself up soon, along with all other distractions which may or may not get in my way.
I have faith in myself. Sort of.
Oh yeah, I'm also in love. H a h.
05.02.2020
The anxiety over the type of person I wished to represent overwhelms me, dragging experiences, daily condundrums and battles down an endless drain.
Shame shines as the "favorite" means of punishment towards any such emotion we fail to understand.
Currently, clinging to a made up construct for life in itself has rendered my own living mind a most miserable place, and I'm very sure it is a similar story for many unfortunate people.
How frightening, to mold one's self by following other selves, when it is very much real how nobody has clear control over transformation.
Surely, with the advancements we follow, none such issues should coexist.
27/07/2019
Closure can be mortifying, it amazes me how overwhelming power dissipates into apathy.
I am isolating myself.
My health wavers, and my mind sleeps.
Storms are my only source of comfort.
Praise.
There'll always be a degree of nostalgia using this platform to spread thoughts out there.
Updating the central datebase here, magically passing exams from my studies abroad.
Confusion is imminent, and I'm longing for a long lost time where my abdomen and stomach didn't have such violent reactions to whichever concoction of conspirarcies my mind wills believe at any given moment.
Every day is a walk closer to retreating, although I'm at a spiritual halt.
I've not been too kind to myself, I ought to be proving my gratitude towards Buddha, rather than facing walls while working, somehow supposing an answer will come to me.
Some kind of tra
Up and at 'em.
I attempt to keep this profile active despite there isn't much of a community left here.
Perhaps I use this platform as some sort of anonymous escape, so here's some updates:
I've moved to a different country, I've met people who reminded me of just how cynical and narrow minded I've always been, choosing to believe a darker reality, and I've chosen to proceed with artistic studies as it's the only subject I'm somewhat acceptable at.
Pretending depression isn't lurking behind every corner isn't a lie anyone should attempt to believe in, however it's sinful in itself to succumb to its clutches.
Perhaps I've never properly chosen an approa
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